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Author:
Genre:
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Ken Orford
Satirical Play
U |
| A
family- the Fletchers - is sitting down to dinner. There is David
(Dad), Miriam (Mum), Rebecca (age 17), Peter (age 15) and Ruth (Age
11). They are in the middle of saying Grace. |
| David |
…
and finally, Lord, we thank you again that you have seen fit to provide
us with an elected God fearing Government that has enabled us to adopt
the laws you ordained in your Holy word. Amen |
| All |
Amen
|
| David |
Dig in to
the Lord’s fine feast. Well, what sort of a day did we all
have? |
| Ruth |
At school
today we had “Show and Tell”. James Walker brought
in a toy dinosaur, and he said that it had been proved that dinosaurs
were over 50 million years old. |
| Miriam |
Oh my. What
did the teacher say? |
| Ruth |
Well, she
said that he ought to know better, and that the Bible says the whole
world is only 5,400 years old. But then he said ‘Prove
it!’ |
| David |
Goodness. I
blame the parents, he must get these crazy ideas from somewhere. So
what did Miss Bradshaw do then? |
| Ruth |
Well, she
said that the Bible was proof itself, and told him to go straight to
the Headmaster. I think he got suspended, and social services are going
to see his parents. |
| Miriam |
Well if he
comes back I don’t want you talking to him. |
| David |
Well,
I’ve heard bad things about that family – I
wouldn’t mind betting they’ll be cast out. |
| Ruth |
Daddy, where
do people go that have been cast out? |
| David |
Well, a lot
of them live in the boxtown, just outside the city limits. But most of
them try to leave the country and go a live in a heathen country. But
they are all full, so it’s pretty difficult to get out. |
| At
this point a woman in
ragged clothes comes in and clears the dishes
and starts to serve the next course. |
| Peter |
Hey, why
don’t
we just
take them on as slaves? I’m sure they’d be better
than the ones we’ve got now. |
| He
looks at his plate and
turns to the woman |
| Peter |
This
plate is dirty! |
| He
clips the woman round the ear! No one says anything. |
Rebecca
|
Oh come
on Peter, you
ought to
know the answer to that – you must have done it for your
Scripture GCSE O Level. Leviticus Chapter 25 tells us we have to treat
slaves differently if they believers or unbelievers. It says "You shall
not rule over him ruthlessly; you shall fear your God”. And
we have to free them every seven years. But for non believers we can do
what we like with them. |
| Peter |
Oh that
was next on my
revision
list. |
| Rebecca |
We had a
bit of
excitement at
school as well. |
| David |
What
happened to you? |
| Rebecca |
Well,
Sarah came to
school with a
kilt on! |
| Ruth |
Was it
too short? |
| Rebecca |
Oh no,
it was below the
knee but
kilts are forbidden garments! |
| Ruth |
Why? |
| Rebecca |
Leviticus
19:19 tells us
we
mustn’t wear clothes made out of more than one type of
thread. So she had to go home and change. |
| Miriam |
I hope
you’ve
all
remembered that it’s your cousin Jessica’s wedding
on Saturday. So if you want anything special washed, let the slaves
know. |
| David |
I’m
glad that
she and
Susan are tying the knot. I was wondering if they’d ever get
round to it. |
| Peter |
I
suppose
that’s about
the only advantage of being a woman. You get to chose if you want to
marry a man or a woman. |
| Ruth |
Why
can’t men
marry each
other, mum? |
| Miriam |
Peter,
this will be good
revision
for you. You tell her. |
| Peter |
Well,
sis. Leviticus
Chapter 18
verse 22 says “Do not lie with a male as one lies with a
woman; it is an abhorrence”. So you see homosexuality is
specifically forbidden for men, but it’s okay for women. |
| They
eat in silence for a while. |
| Ruth |
Mum? |
| Miriam |
Yes,
Ruthie? |
| Ruth |
If I
get all my homework
done, can I
go to the stoning? |
| David
and Miriam look at each other. |
| Miriam |
I
don’t know darling.
You may not like it. |
| Ruth |
But
all the other kids are going.
And I’ve never seen one. |
| Miriam |
Well,
I suppose you have to go
sometime… |
| Ruth |
Yippee! |
| Peter
and Rebecca object together. |
| Peter |
That’s
not fair |
| Rebecca |
What?
I was thirteen
before you
let me go. |
| Miriam |
But
things are different
nowadays.
Children grow up so much faster. Remember, when your Dad and I were
growing up there were no stonings. |
| Peter |
Well
I hope
you’re not
going to let her come to the burning next week. Those three people from
the next street that were caught together. |
| Ruth |
Why
are they not being
stoned, like
the two people tonight? |
| David |
Well,
Leviticus 20:10
tells us that
adulterers – like the two people tonight – must be
just stoned to death. But 20:14 says explicitly if a man knows his wife
and her mother, then all three are to be burned. |
| Miriam |
I
can’t imagine
what
would make anyone want to do that. |
| David
looks at the picture of his Mother-in-Law on the sideboard.. |
| David |
Neither
can I. ..neither can I. |
©
Ken Orford, 2008
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